MY heart WAS broken, MY pride WAS stolen

ok. i was listening to "these days" by the foo fighters and thinking about how much i can relate personally to the lyrics. in the chorus it sings: Easy For You To Say Your Heart Has Never Been Broken Your Pride Has Never Been Stolen i can relate to that, to THE LITTLE GIRL (i refer to her as a little girl because only a little immature girl would do something like she did.. pfft. grow up.) who was nosey enough to trace back on her brother's facebook friends account or his nosey ass fiance who came at me accusing me of not believing God or some bullshit like that.. i don't know how in the world she gets that conclusion from what happened with the car accident. IF SHE WAS SO DAMN HOLY, SHE WOULD KNOW THAT IT'S A SIN TO PASS JUDGEMENT ON WHETHER SOMEONE BELIEVES IN GOD OR NOT. NOW, she can go denying that she logged onto my webpage all these days and posted messages about God on there, because if she believes in God so much- IT'S ALSO A SIN TO LIE- YOU CAN'T SAY THAT YOU NEVER LOOKED AT MY BLOG AND POSTED ALL THIS STUFF ABOUT GOD ON THERE (i must have got about 20 of them from her). I DON'T KNOW THE POINT OF THOSE MESSAGES! the only logic that i can come up with is that she felt threatened. i'm pretty damn sure that i didn't respond to them because to tell you the truth.. i didn't have time for that bullshit, tim asked me why i just took it from his sister and i'm more than sure that i told him the same thing. now, i realize this wasn't all tim's fault. never did i point a finger at tim, accidents happen.. alright? alright. NO ONE MADE me buy the plane ticket to new york. i was stupid enough to do that, which is why i can relate to the part of the song that says, "Your pride has never been stolen" because i was stupid enough to have enough pride to take my ass to new york and expect to get back to minnesota in one piece, with nothing bad happening to me at all. my heart was broken because i had liked tim, which seems obvious to the outsider looking at the situation (not knowing the details). i gave him a call after the car accident and even after the car accident, i wasn't mad at him.. i looked at it as, "accidents happen, we all make mistakes. no one is perfect."- as i said before. well, he told me that he was on facebook, so i added him as one of my friends. i looked at his information and seen that he was engaged. that's when my heart was broken. i mean.. yeah.. what am i supposed to expect? it was like 10 years later, we need to move on with our lives sometime. well, "alright." i say and suck it up. so now, i'm just going to go back to the game plan of trying to walk again and get my degree. the annoying people who think that i'm an atheist probably don't even read my blog anymore, oh well, this was the only time that i actually had time to get this shit off my chest otherwise i'm too busy because now we're actually on our big long two week spring break at rasmussen. not to forget- i'm trying to walk again, SO THAT I CAN GET MY PRIDE BACK. i start my first day of thereaputic recreation at gillette on tuesday where the therapist said that she would get me on the wii fit which is a machine which helps you walk when you look at some tv's and gets you on your feet at the same time. never once have i bitched about being in a wheelchair, i'm just gonna get my dead ass up on my feet and not even think about complaining or crying about it, complaining won't get me walking again. my reverse walker is supposed to come tommorow. ANOTHER THING, i'm SICK of having to go outta my way for guys. even just to have a simple friend in this apartment building, i need to go outta my way and go to his room. ok, so i understand the fact that he can't go into regular apartments because of the fact that he needs an automatic door because he walks with a walker but it just seems like he's always busy or has company over when i go to his apartment to hang out with him. maybe that's his way of telling me to go away? i don't know. the rest of the people in wheelchairs that are on my floor i don't want to hang out with. tim told me that i could call him when i wanted to and whenever i've tried for the past (i dunno) 5 months? it always sends me immediately to voice mail, my home health aid was telling me that the father of her child (who is divorced to her now) had put her number on block, so that it would always send her calls to voice mail whenever she'd call him (but he wouldn't get the voice mails, it'd just say that). she said that he got an app for that, so i dunno if it's the same thing here. i'm tired of going outta my way for anyone though, IF THEY REALLY WANT TO TALK TO ME, THEY'LL FIND A WAY.